You Know She's Right ...

Teresa Gambaro caused predictable outrage, but anyone who has ever walked into a public toilet knows she’s right, though.

Although off the cuff and consequently ill thought out in terms of delivery, Teresa Gambaro’s suggestion that migrants be taught the Australian norms of hygiene and social etiquette is not unreasonable. The claim that they already know such things is directly contradicted by evidence from Australians' everyday experience.

Despite the self righteous indignation from members of the Labour Party (I suggest more about winning votes than their privately held opinion after entering a public toilet) and manufactured outrage from the very people who in my experience would do well to heed the advice, many Westerners would be thinking they are glad somebody said what needs to be said.

It’s not that hard:

·         Don’t piss on the toilet seat. If you’re a male, that means lift it up before you wee (and put both seats back down after you have finished). Don’t squat on the fucking thing (women included), putting your dirty shoe prints all over it and possibly some piss drips and a turd streak. That’s what third world peasants do. Who would want to sit down after you have done that? Do you even care about the amenity of your fellow human beings? (I know the answer is “No”).

I once taught at a university with a large number of Asian students. In one building which did not have separate toilets for staff, the women lecturers refused to use them. They walked back to main campus. They said the common toilets were far filthier than they had ever seen at any pub ... the seats covered in footprints and piss, even streaks from badly aimed bombs. The cleaners ended up complaining to management.

In case anyone tries to continue the paper thin pretence that Asians weren't responsible, the sandal footprints were the damning evidence. Don't pretend that saying so is racist either. No-one is implying their DNA is the cause. These are cultural problems.

The university sector is traditionally one of the most egregious bastions of political correctness. However, Swansea University has given in to reality and placed signs in toilets showing its foreign students how to use them. They actually admitted the problem was due to "foreign students" and blamed "cultural differences".

Of course, someone was going to complain. Some dopey (white) students described the posters as "ridiculous" and "belittling". They're not aimed at you, stupid. A good example of the phrase: "Plenty of education, but no brains."

Perhaps they realised who the posters were actually aimed at, but couldn't even bring themselves to voice the racial / cultural connection, lest their ideologically based world view be contradicted by evidence.

Civilized people sit on the toilet. We may or may not read the Daily Telegraph at the same time … that is our choice. The point is that when we have finished our business, the only trace of our presence is a warm dunny seat and a few stray farts. If you genuinely wish to join the civilized world, this is how you should “do your business”.

Having just returned from Hong Kong (proper toilets) and China (squatting over a hole in the ground), it is fairly obvious the former is the result of the civilizing, British influence.

You copy everything from university assignments to handbags to movies and electronic equipment … why can’t you just copy one of the few things we want you to?

·         Wear deodorant. It’s not racist. If you eat different food, you smell differently. I’d expect the same advice if I lived in a foreign country and the locals thought I smelled … In fact, I’d be mortified and try to figure out a way to not smell.

I sat next to a girl from India in a Physics tutorial once (could have been from any one of a number of lands – nothing in particular about India). It was March and 30^oC. I tried, but could not cope, so I had to get up and move. She was embarrassed. The alternative was (quite genuinely) vomiting. Her smell was appalling. I don’t know for certain whether or not some young, Indian guy would have loved it, but I’m friends with quite a few Indians and they tell me I did nothing wrong.

·         Don’t push in. This edict encompasses a variety of queueing practice. Civilized people recognise who has precedence by time of arrival and wait in an orderly and generally patient manner based on the aforesaid precept (unless some selfish, ignorant fuckwit is causing a problem).

We wait until people get out of the lift / train / bus / tram before we get in / on. If you are incapable of doing this, I’m guessing you’re Asian or Arab.

Don’t push straight to the front when there is a group of people needing service. You may receive a punch in the face (which is not an admission that Fingo has done this).

·         Don’t automatically respond to conflict by telling lies. This is really a subject of a separate blog, however note this: we know you are lying and you are losing more face by lying and trying to front it out than saying you are sorry (if you really are in the wrong).

·         Don’t think that your "community" is entitled to special rights or to have rules altered because they conflict with "your culture". We don't reserve parliamentary seats for certain religious or ethnic communities. We don't create separate areas of the beach just for women. In some situations, people are required to show their face for identification.

Should we not give this advice (in some terms) to prospective visitors?

Suppose we discount the self interested lies and pandering for the ethnic vote which is currently the province of the left. Should we really resile from asking people to refrain from squatting and pissing on the toilet seat, smelling like Beelzebub's arsehole and pushing into queues?

No!

I don’t know about you, but I’m not really that concerned if someone who is not Australian is insulted, or confects it. There are certain, basic social norms to which prospective immigrants must adhere or face censure.

It does not matter if a cabal of left wing academics, politicians, lawyers and journalists deems that people who are not from the majority social group (white, Anglo Saxon, Protestant derived) have been discriminated against or vilified by telling them how the majority expects them to behave. The set of acceptable social norms should be presented and citizens should be able to challenge them at their will. Other citizens should be able to criticise deviations from these social norms if they want to. Given adequate, democratic mechanisms, there should be no conflict with the most basic precept of freedom of speech.

Update: Learn to speak English.

Despite the dishonest and self serving criticism levelled at her, Teresa Gambaro has followed up with the quite reasonable observation that migrants should learn English and would probably experience less racism if they do, as it would help them get to know people in the wider community.

How terribly racist! Learn to speak the local language so you can get to know people better and find it easier to fit in? How patronising! But migrants don't have to "fit in" to our multicultural system, do they? "Fit in" is one of crypto-imperialism's standard codes for assimilation and assimilation is a racist policy.

Last week she observed that: "we are talking about hygiene and what is an acceptable norm in this country when you are working closely with other co-workers", which means "don't squat on and piss all over the toilet seat and flush when you have finished".

Stalwart of the lunar left, Kate Lundy provided a salient example of the type of irrational logical inversion sensible, honest people are up against with her response: "She should not blame the victim for the crime".

If I have to go to another floor just to have a shit because the toilets are unusable after about 10.30am and if the cleaners are complaining to management, we're the fucking victims!

The perpetrators are the ones who can't use a public toilet in a civilized manner. Let's not pretend they are Westerners.