Which Barbie Would Ken Fuck?

Mattel are free to make as many “plus size” Barbies as they want, but I think we can all guess what the marketing department’s response will be. Who the fuck is going to buy a fat Barbie? And no-one else can make one because of trademark.

More importantly, which Barbie is Ken going to want to fuck? Not the one who looks like an ageing Diana Dors, that’s for sure.

I’m told that fat chicks are more grateful, so perhaps a “plus size” Barbie may indulge some of Ken’s more outré requests, such as A2M. However, I think it more likely she’d end up having a couple of drunken one night stands with his friends before descending into a life of alcoholism.

Barbie might think that she has Ken’s cock and balls in a cute little, Swarovski crystal covered jewellery box on her dresser, but Ken can rebel, as this episode of Life InThe Dreamhouse shows. I was thinking the episodes Oh, How Campy and Closet Princess may show Ken rebelling even further, but Barbie is clearly doing enough to keep Ken’s eye from wandering. Actually, I suspect Barbie would go off like a firecracker if Ken stuck his tongue up her arse.

A lot of people bag Ken, but Barbie obviously likes him, so he must be doing something right. I’m pretty sure Ken would rather shag the current, slim Barbie than a big, fat chick. In fact, he confirmed this the other day while we were having a few beers and watching Mana Mamau.

Plus Size Modeling’s Facebook campaign is a good example of the entry into the middle class majority of one of the most destructive inventions of the modern left: identity politics. “We’re being discriminated against as a group! Let’s get together and fight for our right to assert our identity as people of colour / women / LGBTIQ / people with disabilities / plus sized women …!”

Taking a characteristic which society uses to categorise people, then using it as an active grouping mechanism may get many of those groups some gains, but overall it makes society more fractious and creates enmity, as well as influencing people to see one another in more one dimensional, less human terms.

People will always be judged on their behaviour and being fat is primarily the result of behaviour.

You can be as fat as you like, as long as you pay your own medical bills. You can walk around telling everyone you’re just as sexy as any other woman, as long as you don’t bung on an act when you get laughed at, or claim your human rights have been violated through being vilified on the basis of your body shape.

The problem here is that an essentially middle class group has appropriated the left wing ideology of trying to force corporations / governments / society to behave in a certain way in order to validate their “identity”. It doesn’t matter that said identity is merely one of many facets of the person. This is how I construct myself and if you don’t accept my position without question, that’s discrimination! Society’s values and preferences must be re-engineered so that I don’t have less successful outcomes than those outside my constructed group.

Well, if you’re fat, you will find you’re less likely to get a fuck. That’s because less people are attracted to the overweight. BBW sites are fetish, not mainstream.

You’ll also find you’re less likely to get a job, good service and respect in general.

Why?

There are known genetic factors in differences in natural body weight within animal populations. However, aside from pathologies such as brain lesions, there are two causes of obesity: gluttony and sloth.

A significant majority of overweight people want to lose weight and confess they would be happier if they could. Yet they don’t. Genetic differences make it significantly harder for some people to lose weight than others, however the human body is not a nuclear reactor. It is not even a very efficient metaboliser. The reason why most people are fat even though it depresses them is that they lack the discipline and commitment required to lose the weight and keep it off.

People know this. Thus, if you’re a great big blubber and you see a thinner (but equally or less qualified) person get the job you want, it’s because your potential employer has formed the impression that you lack discipline, give up easily or lack sufficient self respect. If you find you’re getting poor service, it’s because the person doesn’t respect you, for these same reasons.

Because they aren’t fat and wouldn’t ever want to be fat, they automatically assume you don’t want to be fat either. Thus, you must be fat due to character flaws.

No amount of social engineering is going to change this widely held view. That’s because it’s in large part correct. Being fat is not like being black or being gay.

Fat women are in general judged more harshly than fat men. That is because some fat men are strong, much fitter than they appear and gain respect on that basis eg. front row forwards. Fat, flabby, unfit men are not respected. Even in the case of fat men who are powerful, their power is respected, but they are still objects of satire or ridicule and referred to as fat cunts eg. Clive Palmer.

Like an alcoholic, drug addict or unsuccessful gambler, you have to work at being fat. No-one becomes an enormous porker overnight. No-one becomes a drunk or a drug addict overnight. Some people are far more susceptible than others, however no-one sleep walks into it and everyone can get out of it with sufficient discipline and willpower, despite the chemical changes in the brain and endocrine system which take place in obese people or addicts.

There is the argument that materially different body shapes are the norm of attractiveness in other cultures both today and historically, so Western society’s preference against fat people is merely an artefact of our culture and has no inherent biological driver. Therefore we could change our society’s views so that fat people were no longer considered unattractive. Then they would not feel pressure to lose weight and would no longer suffer from higher rates of depression and low self esteem.

It’s a lot easier to join with other overweight people and tell each other that you’re beautiful just the way you are and it’s society which is the problem. Maybe they should all join the SPK.

The “fat identity” validators’ reasoning is fallacious. Western society knows a great deal more about medicine and the human body than all of these other cultures. Anyone believing otherwise is deluded. Asian medicine is often posited as an attempted counter to the claim of Western medical superiority. However, despite some demonstrably effective elements such as acupuncture, Asian medicine largely argues by metaphor and is thus still rooted in mysticism.

There is clear scientific evidence that being fat both shortens lifespan and decreases overall quality of health. There is a known, healthy range of body weight as a function of age, sex and height. Being outside it is demonstrably bad for your health.

Thus, given Western society’s medical knowledge, being obese is like being a pack a day smoker or someone who gets drunk every night. There’s a subculture which attempts to validate each of these behaviours, but most people see them as character flaws and wonder why “those people” don’t make more of an effort to stop harming their health.

This post is not intended as advocating a campaign of fat shaming, “nudging” or any form of social engineering beyond appropriate taxation of certain foods and beverages which contribute to health problems. I do however, want to strongly encourage people not to be sucked into pandering to the identity politics of the League of Fatties and their own attempts at social engineering.

I have posited an explanation of why fat people in Western societies have statistically less successful social outcomes and why it’s not going to change any time soon. It’s why we shouldn’t pander to the new fat identity politics. Don’t feel guilty if you think fat people are lazy and undisciplined: they are. That’s why they’re fat.

At the same time, let’s not allow fat control to become a new goal for the nanny staters. The politically pious already have more than enough at which to tut-tut. “You can’t become obese eating organically grown quinoa as part of a socially responsible, vegetarian diet.” “How terrible it is that Westerners eat so much more than they need when all those black and brown people are starving.”

If a person is fat and happy, prefers the joys of gluttony to a longer life and doesn’t care what other people think, they should be free to make that choice, as long as they accept (and can pay for) the consequences. As for fat people who are stung by receiving criticism, less respect or being considered less attractive, no amount of delusion will change that … and attempts to co-opt the left wing ideology of identity politics will fail, because being fat really is ultimately a combination of character flaws and lifestyle choice.

No they aren't ... but they are more grateful.