Resch's - It's Got To Make A Comeback

Resch's has slowly been disappearing off tap in pubs around NSW for the last 20 years. Now it’s hard to find it on tap outside of clubs and old school pubs. This is just wrong. Resch's drinkers need to take a stand.

Resch's is a proper beer. Like it says on the tap: "A Real Drink!", or on one of those old style posters: "A Man's Drink". 

Resch's Draught. Resch's Pilsener. Remember Resch's Dinner Ale? I last saw that on tap about 10 years ago.

I love those old Resch's posters. There’s one that says "Resch's Refreshes" above a picture of Easts playing Newtown, with one player looking like he's trying to twist the other one’s head off in a tackle:

Here's one that's of that style, if not as good:

Here's a better ad. Imagine this on the SCG fence or the wall of the front bar at your local (wouldn't be appropriate in the Ladies' Lounge of course):

Look at the plethora of beers on tap at pubs which have been "modernised". There are the wheaty German ones, Asahi, Cooper’s Red and Green and a slew of boutique stuff, some of which is pretty good if you want to go from beer to beer in a sample fest.

If a pub can afford to put on boutique beers, what’s the problem with Reschs? Too many dopey little gen Xs and Ys drinking piss like Becks and Heineken because their little palates don’t like the hops, probably.

The more down market teens and twenty somethings drink these stupid, gimmicky beers like Carlton Cold, Hahn Super Gay, Toohey's Extra Gay or Toohey's Blue Ice. Soulless rubbish.

American beers are full of soap. If you want to wash a swearing kid’s mouth out, just do it with Budweiser. I drank a glass when I was in New York. Once. Didn’t even finish it.

I can’t understand how American beers can be so bad. I’ve been to central Europe. Every country there knows how to make beer … well. America has tens of millions of immigrants from central Europe. What’s the fucking problem? Does all the sugar in their food kill their taste buds?

I’m glad Cooper’s has made a comeback. It’s got a bit of variety and I’m generally happy enough to drink it, although not in preference to Resch's.

The most bizarre thing is that you can only get Resch's Draught on tap and only Resch's Pilsener at the bottle shop. What are Carlton & United doing? Surely if people want to drink Resch's Draught at the pub, they’d buy it to take away. Conversely, if they buy Resch's Pilsener at the bottle shop, why wouldn’t they drink it at the pub? I used to and still would. Yet I haven’t seen Resch's Pilsener on tap anywhere for at least 10 years. Just doesn’t make sense.

In fact, it doesn’t make sense that Carlton & United brew Resch's in the first place, when you see some of the other crap they churn out.

How does CUB manage to make Resch's, KB and Sheaf Stout and then give us Foster's, Carlton and VB? Edmund Resch must be turning in his grave to have his pride and joy beside that swill.

Foster's tastes like half an ordinary beer poured into half a glass of water. Not Vitamin F at all. Carlton is not much better, but at least it’s inoffensive.

VB? Vaginal backwash. Fuck me! I don’t know how anyone can drink this piss. It’s as if CUB have stirred several cakes of soap into the Carlton vat and stuck the green VB label on the result.

In CUB’s defence, there are actually some great beers in their stable, like the old school KB. "Kids’ Beer", we used to call it as we gulped it down as teenagers. Or Sheaf Stout, which as well as being perfect in a large mug on a winter evening, is far better than Guinness in a beef and Guinness pie. Asahi is pretty refreshing on a hot day. It has a clean, crisp taste and genuinely goes well with Japanese food.

Cooper's, Sheaf Stout, Resch's. These are proper beers. Each has its own style and flavour.

What the fuck are Foster's? Budweiser? VB? Watery, soapy piss, that’s what.

Toohey's New is an old school, plebeian beer that's still widely available on tap. It's pretty ordinary, but can be drunk if there's nothing else. Kind of like ordering a beef in black bean sauce and a sweet and sour pork from the take away. If it can survive, how can Resch's possibly fail to kick its arse if properly marketed?

People who like proper beer need to campaign to bring back BOTH Resch's Draught and Pilsener on tap AND into the bottle shop.

Some cheeky young barmaid said to me a little while ago: "We don’t have Resch's on tap here … isn’t that an old man’s beer?"

"Do I have big ears with hair growing out of them? Are my trousers pulled up above my navel with my tie tucked into them?" I asked. "You cheeky young whippersnapper!"

Resch's is definitely old school, but that can work in the hands of a good marketer. DEV-O are old school and their work is quality that never dies.

Even if little twits in their teens and early 20’s won’t drink it, who cares? Aren’t there enough drinkers in the 25 – 40 age group?

I think Brian Fingerton needs to use the enormous reach of RTBB to start an on line campaign.

Bring back Resch's now, CUB! Get Pilsener back on tap and market it properly.

Update: RockNRoll Smorgasbord has reminded me of a beer I had forgotten: Old Kent Brown. I used to drink this occasionally when I was at uni. It's pretty good. Here's a list of pubs where you can still find it on tap.

I've also been drinking James Squire Amber & Golden Ales lately, partly because the pub around the corner from work has them on tap (but no Resch's). These are more beers to be drunk in cooler weather, out of a mug, especially the darker and creamier Amber. Resch's is best drunk out of a longneck.