Mate, You Are Uzzy!

If you want to see an example of extreme wogginess and why the word “wog” is used in the derogatory context it often is, look no further than this clip of Usman Ahmed (Uzzy) fighting Ashley Sexton in Jan 2010.

It’s 3.36 of non-stop, derisive laughter, unless you’re a wog.

First comes Uzzy’s ring entrance, dancing around and beating his chest to some hip-hop like a cross between a monkey and a peacock. This goes on for about 1.30.

Next, he ponces about in the ring by himself until Ashley Sexton tries to get through the ropes. The terrifying Uzzy goes over and gets right in his opponent’s face, puffing out his bantam chest and eyeballing him all the way to the centre of the ring.

Ashley Sexton doesn’t seem too concerned. You can see him laughing to his corner prior to the touch of gloves.

Unfortunately for Uzzy, like most yappy little dogs, his bark is a lot worse than his bite. Ashley Sexton delivers a one punch knockout about 1.55 into the fight.

It’s a superb punch and Uzzy takes more than a minute to get back to his feet, even with his corner holding him up.

Uzzy fights at flyweight (112 lbs), so he’s smaller than an average sized woman. Here’s his professional boxing record. As of October 2011, he had 6 wins from 12 bouts, 4 of those against fighters who haven’t won a bout and the other 2 against guys with 1 and 3 professional fights. Additionally, none of Uzzy’s 6 wins have come by KO, so he couldn’t knock a pea off a chop.

Uzzy was 6 from 9 when he fought Ashley Sexton, who was 8 from 8, with 4 KOs. It was for the vacant British flyweight title, so worth stepping up in class, but even so I suspect Uzzy’s manager should have worked out he was well overmatched. All the posing in the world isn’t going to worry someone who can knock you out with a single punch.

Remember those Boppo the Clown air filled punching toys? They stood about four feet tall on a curved base, so when kids punched them, they bounced right back up for more.

Fingerton Corp will market Uzzy Boppos, except if you punch them hard enough to keel over, they will stay down until you help them back up.

Uzzy has also been immortalized in the lexicon via the phrase: “Mate, you are Uzzy”, delivered in a Lebanese accent. It is an order of magnitude up from the more widely used: “You are shit, mate”, also delivered in a Lebanese accent.